True Confessions–
“Grow Your Business” didn’t make it to my “To-Do” list for much too long after becoming a practitioner. Yet the truth is that I wouldn’t be where I am today without my mentors. Since graduating from my training with Moshe Feldenkrais in 1977, I’ve found it essential to have people in my life who can see my blind spots AND my potential.
Nevertheless, for decades, I thought I could grow my business by learning more about what I already knew–so I worked with people who took me deeper and deeper into the layers of my modality.
It was only when I started working with business mentors–and filling in the gaps around what I didn’t know–that my business actually started to grow!
Is it convenient to grow your business?
The funny thing is, when I think about each of the people who’ve been my perfect mentors–no matter what I wanted to learn from them–I don’t remember that even one of them showed up at a really convenient time, or when the financial investment was welcome and comfortable.
Mentoring has always involved schedule-juggling, a lot of the time, it involved a ridiculous amount travel, and until the last few years, it always involved being away from my kids, or schlepping them with me.
I know in my heart that if mentoring is convenient and comfortable, I’m probably not being asked to take as big a step toward my potential as I could. So convenience and comfort aren’t actually very good standards in helping me decide whether or not to make an investment in myself.
In 2009, I took a huge leap into business mentoring, something completely new for me. I was just sitting there at a workshop, minding my own business and the opportunity fell into my lap. From the moment I saw it, I really wanted it… and then my voices started – “You can’t afford it. You’re too busy. You won’t be any good at it. It won’t work–just like everything else you’ve tried. It’ll end up being everything you hate. You’ll feel sleazy. It’s a waste of money. They try to make you into mini-versions of themselves.”
Maybe you know what I’m talking about… most practitioners tell me they have harsh voices that bash their dreams.
But I just couldn’t suppress the other voice, the one that urged me to try something really different, something that would push me outside the familiar.
So I took a leap into the unknown, despite the best efforts of my gremlins! I figured out the money. I figured out the time, and the result is that I learned how talk about what I do so that people just about talk themselves into working with me… over 90% of the people who come for a first lesson with me commit to a series of at least 10 lessons!
What I’ve learned is that part of getting the help I need revolves around making the desire to get the help more important than the circumstances I can come with to stop me from getting that help. Before anyone can help with anything, I have to commit.
But when you know you need help, and you’re willing to get it, how do you choose the right mentors? It’s not about luck–there are questions you need to ask yourself!
3 Key qualities mentors must have, to help you grow your business
When it’s time for you to pick someone to work with–no matter what kind of mentorship, coaching or program you may be considering–make sure these qualities are in place, by asking yourself questions that get beneath the surface:
1. Is the person relevant?
Think about it.
There are a lot of coaches and mentors who offer programs, products, workshops, wisdom… and it doesn’t mean that all it is right for you. When you are clear about what you want to learn, it’s easier for you to look clearly at the person you are thinking about learning from.
- Are they teaching what you want to know?
- Do you know that learning this will help you get where you want to go?
- How do they come across to you?
- Is that what you want for yourself?
- Have they proven that what they’re teaching works?
- Are they using what they’re teaching to create success for themselves?
2. Do you trust the person?
Listen to your gut.
It’s easy to like people you want to work with. It’s easy to be blown away by their skill and what they offer. But more than that, you have to know that this person will stand in the fire with you when the going gets tough… and since we’re talking about changing things up, things most likely WILL get tough.
- Are they capable of asking the hard questions and then wait until you answer?
- Do you get a response when you approach them?
- How do you feel when you’re around them?
3. Are you inspired by this person?
Look to your heart.
We all have inner voices that try to help us, and sometimes that means they stop us from moving forward. Having a mentor who helps you step into your highest self makes it easier to stay in touch with why you’re doing the work you are to become the practitioner you want to be. The question is not whether the person is inspiring, but whether the person inspires you to be more than you currently are.
- Is your soul singing when you’re around this person?
- How big is their vision?
- Does your vision get bigger when you’re around them?
- Do you want to go down the trail they’re blazing?
- Does this person raise you up, or put you down?
- Do you feel capable of more in their presence, or less?
Once you decide on a Mentor, Coach or Program…
Commit yourself 100% to the process.
Don’t waste time second-guessing your choice or asking everyone you know what they would have done in your place. Mastering what anyone is teaching requires staying focused on it long enough to ingrain it in your being!
Choose wisely, and give it your all!
Here’s to your great success!
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Did this make you think differently about your practice? Do you want more?
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